NALSAR, like any other law school worth its salt, comes with its own bundle of ridiculous neuroses. What would be special about a place where the machinery gears towards making things convenient for you ?

Of course, there’s inconvenience, and then there’s evil. The college’s system of surprise tests, then, makes a case for the banality of evil. Life you see, is short. Way too short for surprise tests.

Life is long enough for : 1) Cigarette shack afternoons and ciggarette shack evenings 2) Hot Chocolate Fudge with Chocolate Ice cream 3) Lazy Confessions/ Crazy Suggestions 4) The last bell on Friday 5) A few other unmentionables

Point being, there are a couple of things that can exist without making life seem pointless and unmeaningful. Surprise Tests aren’t among them. The trouble begins four days before the tests. That’s when the sinking feel begins to creep; that’s when you realize the one-subject-a-day target ain’t happening. Of course, every day after that is mounting panic. This then escalates on the night before the test. Of course there’s some big chunk left, and of course that’s the one everyone’s predicting will be tested on the next day. Nevermind, there is the morning.

Except there isn’t. Stupid, stupid alarm bell.

The harried walk to the mess, people shouting alarmingly large bits of alarmingly meaningless information across the table. Realizing the extent of screwed one is when one is unable to figure out even the concerned subject being discussed, one proceeds to the next step. The trudge to the class, which brings us to possibly the worst thing about surprise tests. The last 5 minutes before. Oh those last 5 minutes. Packed with every sort of human emotion possible, from delirious fear to delirious giggling to plain delirium. All the 5 subjects screamed out in quick succession. Groans, moans, laughs, sneers.

Of course, you’d think once the first few tests get over, its all smooth sailing. Its not. Then comes the surprise test burnout. This comes from the complacent position of having a couple of subjects past the scanner, and not many left to study from. Inertia. Listlessness. Unproductivity.

Finally, finally, the last disastrous one inches past you. And begins the process of making up for the rest of the semester …

Honestly. Life. Way too short for this.